Go, Go Gadget 'Copter!

Welcome to my mind warp of the day.  I've been thinking about this one for awhile.

My mind has FINALLY caught up with my current size and shape.  Yay!

It's only taken about a year for the catch up.  Sigh.

But I still feel like I am in disguise.  Like Inspector Gadget or something.  A fat girl in a skinny girl costume/disguise.

I now know and realize that that yes, I do look like this:

But I feel that the "true" me looks like this:

I think I am getting this disguise feeling because I am now meeting more people that never knew the fat me.  They only know the skinny me that I am now.

I'll give you an example:

We have a new employee in our department that I've been working with for a few weeks now and I've been getting to know her.  And do you know what? I have this urge to show her a fatty photo.  I want to explain to her that the person in front of her is NOT the true me.  The fatty in the photo is the real me.  I haven't actually shown her a fat photo 'cuz that would be kinda weird and unprofessional.  I doubt that I ever will.  But I want to.

It's like I want to explain away and/or justify my skinniness.  Welcome to Crazytown....population of 1.

Why do I still identify so much with the fatty? Perhaps because I was obese for most of my life?  Who knows.

But don't get me wrong, I LOVE my skinny girl disguise.  A healthy body that looks great? Yes please.

There you go, today's mind warp....in a nutshell.  The end.

P.S.: I wish my friend Amy was still around.  This is totally something that she would have had great perspective and advice for me as a WLS post-op who was in maintenance for over 5 years.  I miss you Amy.

BOOBs 2011 Fun Facts!

I see that this questionnaire is being passed around among the BOOBs attendees.  It's my turn!

How did you pick your blog name?

I originally wanted it to be Lap Band GIRL, but some chick was already using that blogspot name/address. Then I thought about Lap Band B*tch...but didn't want to be known as the potty mouth bandster, so I improvised and went with Gal.  Original, I know.  My creativity abounds.

When did you start blogging?

I started blogging under Lap Band Gal in October 2009, about a week prior to surgery.

Theme of blog (weight loss, family, circus clowns, sci-fi, erotica, fly fishing, doll collecting, star wars, etc)?

All about living with the Lap Band and now with some added perspective on weight maintenance.

Did you go to BOOBs 2010?

Absolutely! It was amazing to meet so many fun ladies who were going through similar issues and challenges with weight loss and the band. 

One of my most memorable moments from BOOBs 2010? A bunch of us were eating breakfast after the 5K and two fellow BOOBs had to excuse themselves to the ladies room to PB....and I kinda wanted to follow them in there to see what this PB issue is all about.  I've only seen one bandster PB (Thank you Amy, a truly great experience standing in front of Macy's in Union Square in San Francisco...a rather public performance...bravo!)

When were you banded?

October 20, 2009

How much have you lost?

115 lbs.

What are you most looking forward to at BOOBs?

I can't wait to reconnect with last year's attendees as well as meet all the new bandsters.  Also, I plan on some serious SHOPPING! I live in podunk middle of nowhere Oregon.  A girl can only do so much online shopping.

What/who do you hope to find/see/accomplish at BOOBs 2011?

Getting away for a long weekend away from podunk middle of nowhere Oregon.

Children? Pets?

1 cat named Pemberley.  As the saying goes, "If I wanted to hear the pitter-patter of little feet, I would put shoes on my cat."

Who is your roomie?

Stephanie from Electric Lady Band.  I can't wait to see Steph again! I last saw her in April when I was in Florida getting ready to go on a cruise.  We originally met at last year's BOOBs.

What day do you arrive?

Friday

What airport/flight/time?

2pm-ish at ORD...gonna ride the EL train to the hotel again like last time....and probably get lost again like last time.  Good times.

What events are you signed up for?

The Friday meet and greet, the Second City comedy show, Saturday dinner, and still thinking about whether I will participate in the Jazzercise class.

Hobbies?

Travel, travel, travel...wait...did I say travel? Oh, and cruising too.

Career?

Is this a yes or no question? Yes, i've got one...i think.

Single? Married? In a relationship?

Single and ready to mingle.

Your birthday month?

January (Capricorn)

What do you want other BOOBs to know about you?

I can be bribed with sugar cookies.  Yum.

Philadelphia Cooking Creme Product Review

I'm always looking for sauces to make my usual protein choice (3 oz. chicken breast) more interesting.

My latest fave??

Philadelphia Cooking Creme.  Yum.

So last night for dinner, I just mixed the following in a small bowl and microwaved on high for 30 seconds:

• 1/8 cup (32 g) cooking creme (Italian Cheese & Herb flavor)
• a splash of milk
• 3 oz. cooked/chopped chicken breast

Tastes like Pesto Alfredo sauce (without the pasta).

Calories: 195

Protein: 30 g

I can't wait to try the Santa Fe flavor next!

Big Sexy!

TLC has a new show starting tomorrow night called "Big Sexy."

Here's the show's description from their website/Facebook: 

Description:

TLC is introducing a special, three-part series called Big Sexy. Big Sexy focuses on the plus-size world, following around five fabulous ladies in NYC and offering an inside look at their lives.

Plot Outline:

“Each episode will feature the women as they attend major industry events, parties and opportunities, all while giving a candid peek into the balancing of their personal, dating and family relationships as plus-size women. They are big, they are beautiful, and they are not sitting at home waiting for life to happen. They know better than anyone that real women can be sexy with curves — no matter what society says.

I totally agree that all ladies should feel confident and beautiful no matter their size or shape.  But I just can't help wondering...will they show the negative health effects of being a plus sized gal?  I doubt it.

So go set your DVR.  

I can't wait to see it.

New Banded Bloggers Alert!

Please stop by and say hello to these newbie bloggers.  They could use some BOOBs love and support:

Brooke gets Banded.  She is having surgery next week!

Lucky Lucy.  She is having surgery on September 8th!

Here's today's funny:

Weigh-in Day...and a Fatty Pic!

Goal Weight: 145 lbs

Today's Weight: 140.0 lbs

Here's the fatty pic that I promised.  It was taken back in 2008 in Egypt.

Most people buy cute souvenirs and collectibles when they travel abroad... but not me, I bought a burqa.  I swear that's me under there.

Happy Friday!

Let Me Tell You a Little Story About a Man Named Twinkie

I had a major fail on my eating choices yesterday.  Here's the list of what I ate...just keepin' it real:

• Breakfast: Peanut Butter & Jelly on toast w/ a glass of milk
• Lunch: Sugar cookie with a melted chocolate truffle baked on top
• Bag of Goldfish crackers
• Snack: Vanilla Bean Frappaccino
• Dinner: Carnitas Tostada with chips washed down with a Strawberry Daiquiri
• Dessert: Frozen Yogurt sundae with Peanut Butter Cups and Chocolate Fudge

And wouldn't you know it as I am waddling out of the Fro Yo shop last night with some serious tummy pain, I hear this comment come out of nowhere "I like your blog."

I turn around and see a cute young family sitting at an outside table.  I say "huh?" (classy, right?)

The man (whom I will call "Twinkie") at the table repeats himself and says "I like your blog."

I say:  "Uumm...thanks? how do you know my blog?" and it turns out Twinkie knows my blog through my surgeon's office.  I forgot I was in their newsletter last month...or maybe it was from a past support group meeting? I can't remember.  He was very complimentary of the blog and my weight loss journey which was good to hear.

However, I must have had the most guilty look on my face as I pretty much felt like the biggest hypocrite that's ever walked the face of the Earth after the fabulous day of eating I had.

Anywhoozle, it turns out that Twinkie is getting his band in October.  Go Twinkie!  I hope to see you at next month's support group!

PS: I have a fill scheduled for next week.  I ran into my surgeon's nurse practioner today (Hi Reeger!) and she may be able to fit me in sooner.  The fingers are crossed!

Do You Have Arm Dangles?

I do.

There seems to be a lot of endearing names floating around among the weight loss blogs for the upper arms: Bat Wings, "The Flaps", etc.

I call mine arm dangles.  'Cuz they just hang there and dangle about in the breeze.

I've recently realized that I am now OK with my arm dangles.  Shocking! I know! When did this happen?

When they first emerged as the fat melted away, they really bugged me.  I tried to hide them with long sleeve tops.  Now, I just let the dangles flap around in all their stretch-marked glory.  It's like I'm about to take flight in Zumba class with these wings.  But really, who cares....seriously.  I doubt that I will ever pursue plastic surgery for them.  One surgery is enough for one lifetime...thankyouverymuch.

On the other hand, I am now having concerns about the inner thighs.  Oh...my.  Elephant skin.  Sigh.  Now that's a situation.   And I'm not talking about Snooki's boyfriend.  Heaven forbid I workout in shorts...that will never happen.

Why is it that once I become OK with one body part, another one emerges and I get all self-conscious?

It's like I'm playing "Self-Esteem Whack-A-Mole."  Just when I think that I've conquered one body part/appearance related issue, another one pops up?

Don't get me wrong, the health benefits from my weight loss completely outweigh any of these excess skin issues.  And to be honest, if my former fatty self was listening to a skinny b*tch like me talking about skin issues, I would roll my eyes and tell her to appreciate her new healthy body.  So feel free to roll your eyes at me.

But do you experience the Self-Esteem Whack-A-Mole issues too? Tell me about it.

There Was a Little Girl

by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

There was a little girl,

Who had a little curl,

Right in the middle of her forehead.

When she was good,

She was very, very good,

But when she was bad she was horrid.

Kindergarten, 1984

I remember my Mom saying this poem to me as long as I can remember.  Originally a cute little poem to say occasionally after my bedtime stories and then jokingly when I was a badly behaved teenager.


I know this poem by heart because I've heard it so many times.  


And do you know what? I always thought that it was just a reference about my curly hair.  I never really put two and two together that the poem is a completely accurate poem about who I am and how I think.  I guess my Mom knew what she was talking about. (Hi Mom!)


Example?


When I am good with my food choices, I am REALLY good.  Practically perfect in every way. (oh wait, that's Mary Poppins).  But you know what I mean.


When I am bad with my food choices, I am REALLY horrid.  I don't just step of the band wagon for a quick naughty bite of something.  I fling myself off the wagon so far that I I get stuck in the land of pizza, cookies, and ice cream.  It takes days, sometimes a week to undo all that I did and for the scale to show a good weight.


I'm still looking for some balance in the land of weight maintenance.  I need to get away from this "all or nothing" thinking.  Something to work on.


Or maybe I just need to find a good hair straightening iron?  Just sayin'.

Zip It. Zip It Good. Pics & Video!

As I reported on the Lap Band Gal Facebook page on Saturday, I stepped out of my comfort zone and went zip lining...in the outdoors...as in nature...with bugs and dirt.  And do you know what? It was SO FUN!

The first thing that happened before we even loaded into the van, was to step up onto the scale and get weighed in.  And do you know what? I had no hesitation jump up onto that scale.  I don't even know what the weight limit was.  Here's the scale graciously laid out in the parking lot for a what I thought was a very public weigh-in.  No biggie for me though.

Sexy helmets and body harnesses.  Good times.

Gettin' ready to zip!

Zip on!

Comparison Photos - Then & Now

I've seen some GREAT photo comparison posts recently among the banded blogosphere and thought that I'd join in.

Blogging THEN:

Blogging NOW:

Chillin' with the Kitteh THEN:

Chillin' with the Kitteh NOW:

Weigh-in Day and the Results Are...

Goal weight: 145 lbs

Today's weight: 140.6 lbs

Happy Friday!

My Local Food Pusher Has Struck Again!

Do you have a food pusher in your life?

I do.  The only thing worse that a food pusher is a food cop.  It's funny how people NEVER used to push food on me when I was a fatty.

My food pusher is one of the sweet little old ladies who works in the cafeteria.  Let's just say her name is "Cupcake."

Here's how today's food push went down:

I was on my usual trip to the cafeteria to refill my water bottle. 

One of my all time favorite things to do during my water fetching, is to take an occasional stroll past the case of freshly baked cookies.  If I can't eat them, I want to at least take a quick glance at them...damn it.  Call it torture, but I do it every day.

Anyways, as I pass the lunch counter area today, Cupcake announces to me that she makes the best coleslaw...ever. I say mindlessly back at her "Is that so?" and I keep walking. That was a tragic error of a comment. 

She then feels the need to prove the point. 

She takes a HUGE tablespoon scoop of the drippy coleslaw from the coleslaw bucket, leans over the sneeze guard glass partition, and hands me the spoon to watch me eat it.  And since I am a card carrying member of the People Pleaser Brigade, I eat it all up. 

Let me tell you, that's a lot of roughage for one bandster to take on in one bite.  I chewed for a really long time and then agreed with a smile that she makes yummy coleslaw.

She then announces that her secret ingredient is SUGAR....sigh.

Does Practice Make Perfect?

No way.

That saying: "Practice makes perfect" annoys me.  There is no "perfect."  The idea that there is no perfect has been a HUGE lesson for me to learn, but I'm finally getting it through my head.

But I do know: whatever I am practicing, I am getting better at.

If I continue the practice of hitting up Starbucks every day for my vanilla bean frappuccinos, then I'm getting better at defeating this tool of mine called the Lap Band.

If I practice choosing protein first at my meals, then I know that I'm getting better at being successful with maintaining my weight.

If I practice making exercise a priority each day, then I'm getting better at improving my heart health and building muscle.

What are you practicing and getting better at? I wanna know.

Where Are Hansel & Gretel When You Need Them?

I have a short list in my head of the few things that I had to give up to become a healthier me with the band.  

But do you know what?  Most of the things don't really matter much to me anymore and more importantly it was TOTALLY worth it.

Some examples? 

• Soda: It took me a long time to get over my addiction to Mt Dew and Coke.
• Chewing gum: who doesn't like minty fresh breath?  Seriously.

One of the toughest things to give up is one of my favorite holiday traditions:  Making a gingerbread house.  And I'm not talking about just any gingerbread house, I'm talking about a house that takes 2 months of weekends to put together with electric lights and weighs 30 lbs.  Yeah, I'm a crafty girl.

Did you know that most gingerbread house builders start in August with their planning, scheming, and building?  Yep, I received an email from these people today reminding me to sign up for the local gingerbread house competition.  It seems that this year's theme is movies and the silver screen.

I participated in 2007 and 2008.  I had an amazing time building the houses and displaying them at the competitions.

Unfortunately, I know that I cannot participate again this year as I definitely cannot be around all that candy for two months.  I will eat it.  I know my limits.

I still go to see the houses on display each holiday season which is fun, but it's just not the same as participating.

Here are photos from 2008:

Roof and sides!

Roof complete!

Frosting!

Who is that?

Construction!

Finished!

How to Gain Three Pounds in Three Days With the Lap Band

Just another friendly reminder to those who may not know...the Lap Band is not the "Easy Button."  I wish it was....sigh. 

The scale reported that I was up 3...THREE...pounds this morning.  I totally saw that coming.

I've just had a fun and food-filled three day weekend.  I pretty much ate my way through it.  If a food was in front of me, I ate it.  That's why I keep my food pantry and fridge stocked with pretty boring and healthy foods.  No temptations.

There were lots of yummy temptations this weekend.

I also thrive...BIG TIME...on routine.  My routine was off so off I went and ate foods that were not good choices.  Who needs protein when you can eat cookies.

Lastly, I need to stop it with the vanilla bean frappuccinos.  Those bad boys are my kryptonite.  The end.

PS: Thank you all for your comments on the dress post...sounds like the red one is the winner! 

She's Going the Distance, She's Going For Speed

I remember when I was a fatty (or if I were more politically correct, I would say "pre-band"), I always had this little voice in the back of mind that would warn me before I stepped onto or sat on something that had a weight limit or size limitation.

Examples?

• Plastic outdoor chairs
• Toilet seats
• Rides at Disneyland/fairs/carnivals
• Antique chairs
• Crawling into the back seat of a two-door car
• Riding on a Segway
• Helicopter ride in Hawaii
• This list could go on and on.

I would always wonder quietly:

Would it break if I sat/stood on it?

Can my ass fit on that chair?  Don't get me started on a discussion of chairs with arms.

Will I be able to fit myself into the back of that car? Will I be able to get back out of that car?

Fast forward to yesterday.  Someone bought a scooter at a neighborhood garage sale and brought it over to my house.  Of course, I jumped on and began scootin' all over the 'hood.

When I was done with my test drive and attempting to beat the land-speed record, I realized that the little voice in the back of my head is no longer there to tell me that I should be worried about breaking things with my weight or size.

I also noticed the warning label on the scooter showed a limit of 175lbs.  Not a problem for me!

Which One Is Your Favorite? Shopping Pics!

I went clothes shopping yesterday. You know, the kind of shopping where you try on A LOT of clothes. Do I get to consider it a workout? Maybe all that trying on clothes will cancel out the fun size Snickers bar that I'm munching on while I type?  Hope so.

Here's what I learned yesterday:

• Coldwater Creek has joined the crazy train of size inflations with their new sizes...they must have gotten their bad habit from Ann Taylor. I was a size 2 at Coldwater Creek yesterday. They also consider a size XL to mean 18-20.  Whatever.  Just another store to confuse women with their sizes.  They also need to realize that no woman wants to wear a sweatshirt with a bedazzled goldfish on it....just sayin'.

• Just because I can fit into something, doesn't mean I should buy it.  How opposite this is to when I used to shop as a fatty.  It was always a struggle to find something that "fits" and doesn't look "horrible."  I always settled for just OK. Now I must LOVE something before I buy it.

OK, onwards to the pics of what I bought....DRESSES!  Sizes 5 through 9 (juniors).

Perhaps one or more of these dresses will make an appearance in Chicago at BOOBs?  Who knows.  Which one is your favorite? 

#1 - Deep purple dress (can't tell in this pic):

#2 - Little black dress:

#3 - Zebra

#4 - Red shorty:

PS: Those heels were just worn for the pics, most likely I'll be exploring options like silver strappy heels/etc.

Weigh-in Day...and Some Analysis

Goal Weight: 145 lbs


Today's Weight: 139.0 lbs


Onwards to some analysis:


I stood on my surgeon's magic scale yesterday that reveals all kinds of fun things.  Here's a comparison with previous weigh-ins:


                                     11/18/10            2/4/11         8/11/11
Weight                         149.9                 144.8              140.0
Lbs Body Fat                 53.8                   48.9                44.3
Lbs Lean Body Mass     96.1                   95.9                95.7
Body Fat Percent          35.8%               33.7%              31.5%


Also, my current calorie count that I burn every day is at 1309...that's sitting still with no exercise.


Happy Friday!

New Banded Blogger Alert!

Please stop by and say "Hi" to MoMoJJ over at her blog My Journey...for JJ.

She's had a discouraging experience with the seminar she attended and could use some BOOBs love and support.

Thanks!

Part 2 - Hot Mess of a Blog Post!

Check out part 2.  WOW!

How Do You Know That You're Successful?

As I mentioned on the Facebook page earlier this week, I had a fabulous opportunity to meet with soon-to-be bandster, Sprinkles**, this past weekend. 

Sprinkles had a lot of great questions and we even explored the grocery store aisles together, checking out all the band-friendly food choices.  I was so proud to see her show up to our meetup with her lists and binders...gotta love another A-type personality bandster!

Sure, we talked about all the tools that are important to a successful weight loss journey with the band: food tracking/journaling, exercise, attending support group, vitamins, and of course MINDSET....80% mental game with the band in my opinion, damn it...sigh.  Still waitin' on that surgery for our brains.

But I feel that the most important thing that we discussed was setting a long term goal that was measurable.

I chose very scale-oriented goals for myself when I was pre-op...'cuz that's how I roll. I've already admitted to my scale whore tendencies....just accept it.

My main long term goal was to lose 100 lbs, which I did achieve at 10+ months post-op.  I also set incremental goals at each 10 lbs lost.  Scroll all the way down to the bottom of this page to check out those goals.

By achieving those goals, I knew that I was successful.

I mentioned to Sprinkles that her goals didn't have to be scale oriented: Perhaps no longer requiring a certain type of medication for an obesity related comorbidity? Resolving a health issue (diabetes, etc). Being able to walk for 30 minutes without having to stop and rest? Fitting into a certain size of pants? 

What goals have you set for yourself to know that you are successful?

Onwards to the link love.  There are so many examples of success out there in the blogosphere...here are just a few that have reached major milestones today:

• Jacquie has reached her goal weight today. Congrats!
• Sarah is celebrating her 1 year bandiversary today!
• Melissa is having surgery today!

**Not her real name (duh)...I like food names...mmmkkaaayy?

To Fill or Not To Fill?

Beth Ann just did a great post about whether she needs a fill or not.

I am having the exact same thoughts as I have a fill scheduled for Tuesday next week.  

Before I get into my reasons for or against the fill, keep in mind that the nurse practitioner who does my fills (Hi Reeger!) reads my blog...and you know how us bandsters know the "right" and "perfect" things to convince those medical professionals to give us our fills.  From the stories that I've read about on the blogs, some of us should be in used car sales with our skills of negotiation. 

If I did get a fill, I would NOT be asking for a "Big Girl Fill"...but rather .2 or .3 ccs.  Just a tweak.

Reasons for a fill:

• I'm getting hungry after about 2.5 hours (eating 3 oz lean protein). This is my main reason.
• I can knock back a Small Nutter Butter Blizzard in 15 minutes flat.  Not a good reason. :-(
• I feel like I've never really used this tool to it's full potential in regards to restriction
• I've NEVER PB'd or been stuck. I'm 21 months post-op. I still wonder what I'm missing out on. I know that it hurts like a mo' fo'...just curious.
• My surgeon's office is 3+ miles away. I could easily get an unfill (just another $125 appt fee..sigh). Another bad reason.

Reasons not to fill:

• I like being able to eat everything that may be available (Work dinners/BBQs/parties/traveling/etc). 
• I don't want to be someone who is constantly double-checking where the bathroom is at a restaurant just in case I need to make a run for it and PB.
• I'm trying to maintain, not lose.  Not sure about this reason...

So, what do you think? Help a bandster out here...fill or no fill?

PS: all time low on the scale again this morning...138 lbs and the jeans were kinda loser than usual this morning...

Want to Read a Hot Mess of a Blog Post?

You know that you do....just admit it.

Get ready to pick your jaw up off of the table when you read this blogger's post. 

I encourage you to comment on that site and give your feedback.  It's time to stir the pot!

Reminding Myself of the Lap Band Rules & a Crazy Dream

I've lost some of my focus lately and need to see my surgeon's Lap Band rules written out again. I didn't get this band to half-ass it, because that's what I've been doing....half-assing it...completely off track.  The scale has hit an all-time low from lack of exercise...yeah...139...muscle lost...WTF.  Sigh.

So here goes:

1. Eat only 3 small meals a day. Chew, chew, chew.
2. Protein first.
3. DO NOT drink while eating. (30 min before and 1 hr after) No carbonated drinks.
4. Take vitamins.
5. Drink at least 64 oz of water a day.
6. Exercise daily.

Onwards to the crazy dream I had last night:  


I was at my surgeon's practice and I'm taken into the usual "fill room" as the reception desk lady calls it (just another exam room in my opinion). Anyways, in walks "Dr. Meredith Grey" from "Grey's Anatomy."  WHAT?!?  She acts like I see her for each and every fill, like it's no big deal.  She announces that she's going to do my fill.  Then all of a sudden, the dream fast forwards and I'm about to leave the room but I want to know how much fill she put in.  And do you know what? She won't tell me.  She says it's not important.  Then I start to argue with her that it is important and damn it I want to know how much she added to the 7.4ccs that I had when I walked in (side note: does anyone else know exactly how much their lap band is filled with?). I like to know these things...  Anyways, I was totally pissed at her!  Then I was woken up by my cat.  What a totally crazytown dream!


My first thought when I woke up was "Where was Dr. McSteamy?"  Now that would have been a better dream.

What Happens at the River, Stays at the River

Did you know that if you drop a digital camera in a river, the lens cover will no longer open all the way?  Just sayin'

Do You Know What I Am Thankful For?

I am thankful because:

• I am no longer sick and tired of being sick and tired.
• I can go swimming without a big cover up.
• I feel more healthy and am no longer winded when I walk to the mailbox.
• I don't feel like I am dieting just because I am eating less. 
• Sleep quality at night is better than ever...and no more naps during the day! I am no longer sleeping my life away.
• I enjoy shopping for tiny size 4/6 clothes, I don't have to settle for a piece of clothing that looks "just OK" 
• I can walk past the candy dish at work. 
• I stay hydrated with actual WATER, no Coke Classic or Mountain Dew for me anymore.
• I park in the furthest parking space instead of driving around for 5 minutes looking for the closest spot. 
• Lane Giant (Bryant) is no longer my only option for decent work/professional clothes. 
• I do not dread formal events, I can't wait to dress up!
• I am no longer dependent on my high blood pressure medications. 
• I don't mind climbing the stairs at work.
• Food no longer has as much power over me.

The Big Scary Monster Called Maintenance

For me, the losing phase of my journey was easier than the maintaining phase.  Note: I said "easier" not "easy."

There is no done.

There is no finish line.

It's forever.

A really eye-opening statistic has been floating around in my head pretty much since September 2009.  I'm sure that you've heard this statistic too: that 95% of people who lose a significant amount of weight will gain it all back.

YIKES.

Check out this recent post from Karla, a non-banded blogger really hit home for me.  Read it.

Being at my goal weight and maintaining can be a completely scary place to be at times, especially since I'm about 7 months at goal now, not 7 years.  It's still new. Perhaps, one day it won't be so scary.  But I still wonder if the Weight-Gain Fairy will wave her magic wand over me while I sleep tonight and make me instantly 256lbs again.  I know a bandster who is 6+ years out and still has this fear.  Does it ever go away?

Anywhoozle, let's talk about goals and accountability:

I set a goal back in January to register with the National Weight Control Registry when I am 1 year into maintenance.  This will be in December of this year....4 months to go until that milestone.  I know I can do it.

Recently, I have decided on another accountability goal, this time something that will remind me each and every day to stay on track and focused. 

It's time for a sparkly.  Yep, a one year at maintenance ring. 

One of my new favorite websites is HERE.  I'm getting lots of great ideas as I think I will probably design my own ring.  There will be some engraving too.  I've got plenty of time to plan it out.  If you have any websites you can recommend to get ideas, please let me know.

Weigh-in Day...and the Results Are...

Goal Weight:  145 lbs

Today's Weight:  141.2  lbs

Happy Friday!

I'm a Scale Whore

Yes.  It's true. I'm a card carrying member of the Scale Whore Society.  {{hangs head in shame}}

Perhaps you're a member too?  We're a fun group of whores, just don't take away our precious scales!

I step up onto that scale first thing each and every morning.  Of course, when I do, I'm nakie AND after a visit to the loo...oops, that was an over-share.  But it is my standard morning routine.  I've been doing it for almost two years now.

I use each morning's weigh-in as a gauge of how I'm doing with my food choices and exercise. 

Want to know something that is totally crazytown? If I don't find time to exercise for a few days the weight on the scale goes DOWN because I lose muscle....and since I'm in a sharing mood, I may or may not use this to my advantage on a rare Friday weigh-in....shhhhh...don't tell anyone mmmkay?  It's our little secret.

Lately, I've seen some bandsters have been having a no scale month. Yes, an ENTIRE MONTH. Our lovely Amy took a break from the scale in July.  Now, I see that my Jazzercise buddy Beth Ann is having a "no scale August."  I am thoroughly impressed.  How do these ladies do it?

There's no way in a million gazillion years that I would or could take a break from the scale when I was losing. I was on a mission to lose....and damn it, I had that spreadsheet to fill out.

I wonder if I could take a break from the scale for the month of September? 

Where could I hide my scale so I don't stand on it every morning? The trunk of my car? No, that wouldn't work...I would take the scale out of the trunk and there'd I be...just be standing on the scale, nakie in the garage....yikes...wouldn't want to scare the neighbors.

Those of you who have taken a break from the scale, where do you hide your scale? OR are you super disciplined and can walk past it without giving in to the temptation to stand on it? Enquiring minds want to know.

Are You Embarrassed to Have a Lap Band?

I'm not embarrassed about my band...at ALL.

You know me...If you let me, I'll get carried away and talk to people about my band until their eyes glaze over and they're bored out of their minds.  And don't forget one of my favorite inappropriate questions that I ask people: "Wanna feel my port?"  (why does that always sound naughty? ....ha ha ha). 

I realize that I am in the minority with my extreme openness about my band.

Anywhoozle, I get emails daily from people researching the possibility of getting a band.  Today, there was a question via email that I couldn't figure out an answer to because I just could not relate.

So, here's your chance to help a potential bandster out:

Cookie** is interested in getting the band, but is having feelings of embarrassment and can't imagine telling anyone about the fact that she is even researching the band.  Cookie also said that getting a band was like admitting that she has a weight problem that she couldn't fix on her own.

So, my questions for you are:

• What were your feelings when you first researched getting the band? Embarrassed? Excited? Scared? Happy? Etc?
• Do you tell people about your band? If you do, how do you tell people? 
• Do you only tell certain people?
• Any other advice for Cookie?

Cookie will be reading your responses and comments.

THANKS!

**Not her real name (duh.)