Weigh-Ins are on MONDAYS - Updated July 3, 2017

Surgery Date: October 20, 2009:

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Everything You See Is Not As It Seems

Let's talk about support group.

Here's how it usually goes down on the second Saturday of each month:

I walk in the door to the check-in table.

I slap on the obligatory name tag.

I grab copies of all the various flyers for upcoming weight loss surgery support groups and classes.

I sit down.

And ya know, I get to sit next to this fabulous lady.

But let me tell ya.

This past Saturday morning?

That is NOT how it went.

I did walk in the door to the check-in table.

I did slap on that name tag.

But when I reached over to grab all the flyers for upcoming weight loss surgery support groups and classes?  ...these flyers to be specific  ...sorry for the blurriness

"Back on Track" Class Series:

"Success Habits" Class Series:

The woman (a WLS post-op, actually) sitting behind the check-in table said to me, "Oh you don't need these, you seem to have figured it out.  Those aren't for you." AND she takes them from my hands. 


I actually smiled and laughed a little when she did it because I thought that she was joking.

But she wasn't.

Perhaps she was being kind.

Or complimentary.

Perhaps she was trying to be nice.

And yeah, I guess she could be judging a book by it's cover.

But these flyers as they state on them "are for those struggling with obesity"

Am I not someone who struggles with obesity each and every day of my life?

It's moments like these that remind me to never judge a person based on their appearance.



  1. Some time the assumptions people make are almost humorous. I had a friend who lost a ton of weight with VSG surgery and people who don't know about it tell her all the time she doesn't need to watch her weight so closely. She tries to just shrug it off but some days she wants to strangle them!

  2. What are your thoughts (as someone who clearly is no longer struggling with obesity - totally kidding) about support groups? I live so far away from the one offered by my clinic. How influential has the support group been on your success?

    1. Support groups have been very key for me in staying focused and on track with my band.

  3. I'm sure she thought she was being complimentary, but seriously to take away your choice, how dare she make that decision for you? Support group is where you go to be around people that have been through or are going through what you've been through. Perhaps you were going through a rough patch, it's not her place to take the flyers out of your hand. While yes, you are rockin maintenance for over two and a half years, there may be some new info you don't have or that could make next week just a bit easier for you to get through. Thanks for sharing this. Just a reminder that we really have no clue what a stranger may be going through.

  4. So what did you say or do? Did you just leave it at that? Take back the flyers? Go get new ones before you left?

    1. I rolled my eyes at her and sat down :(

  5. She obviously doesn't understand the mental hurdles that we are constantly fighting! Naughty! Those workshops sound sooo interesting.

  6. So absolutely true! We are all fighting the fight and we need all the help we can get! Isn't that why you showed up at every class? DUH!!!
    One thing that keeps me focused is my own blog and reading blogs like yours. When things get a little out of hand (as they often do!)....I go back and read my early blog postings and few other significant ones I posted. And, I always, always read the supportive comments people left. I also read your blog (and few others) for inspiration and motivation. I consider it "calling in the troops!"
    I love that your group is having these classes!

  7. If people can't SEE the struggle, then they often do not believe it exists.

  8. That's so interesting. And, in many ways it's a major NSV -- you've gotten your weight to a point where people view you as thin and having your weight under total control. Funny though that she took the forms away from you! I wonder if she thought you had body dysmorphia or something!

  9. The assumption that you are "fixed" because you are skinny is a little maddening. I mean, you are still attending a support group for a reason!...

  10. Nice support! (sarcastic).

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